In a Dark Green Type of Mood
In a Dark Green Type of Mood
I wonder what she looks likes
while your body remains
tattooed with signs of her camp,
residue of past settings,
left to be reclaimed at later days,
as her freedom grants her power
to come and go as she pleases,
knowing to you she holds the deed.
I'm jealous of her;
secretly dreaming of voodoo curses
to rain down pain that feels
equivalent to the hurt I've acquired.
as I've repeat steps, double
checkings of mis-calculated guesses,
wondering why I'm still losing.
and I can feel my footing slip,
you glide steady to our rhythm,
in a zone that doesn't involve me.
you awake to reminiscing the smell
of her hair, remembering the
color of her eyes and the
depth of her wide smile.
you try to ensure me that I only
matter as you drape
yourself with my body and aura,
but I can feel her presence
her name inscribe with french tips
in your back, like brail my fingers
fumble over past scars,
where she'd capture her memories.
I conjure up potions, herbal healings
to erase old routines to be replace
with new patterns engrave by me,
as I wanna spend forever in loops
which involve the waking & sleeping
besides you each night.
I find myself sly in stealing time
applying pressure to switch her imprints
against your hips, wanting to
reshape indents of her thighs
so that you and I may perfectly align.
I try to hold on to you longer
as I feel you fade during the night.
knowing the truth as you'll never
tell me that she exists,
all the while your soul whispers
cryptic notes only she can decipher,
so obvious becomes the evidence
of me invading, as I can tell
it is she that you truly desire.
as she is like a first kiss,
an inkling never forgotten.
02/25/2005
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